welcome 2011... you weird looking number.
At a New Years party last night some friends were discussing what their resolutions will be. No surprises there, and we were suggesting what 2011 should be the year "of". 2009 was the year of drinking, 2010 was the year of WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?!? and so, my dear friends, we have decided that 2011 should be the year of sex. A year of getting laid, feeling less stress, a little more relaxed and a little more sleep deprived. So, in the interest of starting this year out right, here are somethings NOT to do.
I call this list: Fitz's Fail Proof Methods to Not Picking up Men. or How to Avoid Dying Alone.
-Talk about your cats
-Discuss you desperate need for marriage
-Talk about the time you threw up after an eating contest
-Roll your eyes when they talk about sports
-Tell them they need gum, to lose weight, a hair cut
-Tell them they baby names you have picked out
-Talk about your ex boyfriend or most recent unrequited romance.
-Ask to borrow money
-Ask multiple times if they like you, or think you're pretty
-Beat them in a drinking contest
and last but not least, the best way to not get laid: Use the phrase "is that it?" in a pre-intercourse conversation.
I will be taking suggestions and making alterations to this list as the year progresses, all changes will be final come July.
Happy year of sex to you all. I hope you get some.
